Thursday, November 11, 2010

Groped in San Antonio...

Yup, you read that right.

The San Antonio airport opened a new terminal on the day I had a flight home. Outfitted with the latest equipment in the war on terrorism, the TSA's were ready to do battle. Along comes "Dangerous Doug" (that's me) ready to fly home. I fly quite often and have a system of taking everything I have on me and putting it in my computer bag. All I carry on me going through the metal detector is my drivers license and my boarding pass. I never get stopped, never. This day however? Quite a different story. I stood in the new fancy x-ray machine and held my arms up just like the picture in the machine told me to and for some reason, I "triggered an alert" I was then asked to stand on a mat with two foot prints on it. I complied and was then told I needed to submit to a physical search. I was taken in a small room with two TSA men in it to get my search. I was then warned that I was going to get a complete body hand search. Torso, arms, legs, rear end, crotch, hands run all the way around my waste, inside my pants. By the time the search was ending, I was pretty angry. I got a little smart and told them they could at least buy me dinner before they get in my pants...dumb I know but I was not thrilled with having the only metal on me being my fillings and I still get targeted. Here's the kicker. On the way down to Texas, I go into my backpack on the plane to get my iPod and what do I see? my 4.5 inch folding knife and a 7 inch Phillips screw driver...nice job TSA's.
If it happens again, I'll assume it's because I'm big. We'll see...





*EDIT*
Okay, I have now seen many reports on the unconfirmed safeness of the x-ray machines.
I will now refuse to use them which is a 100% grope session. It will be up to me to get creative on what they find on me...heck we all know I'm no stranger to women's under ware and such. I may just wear a bra also and give the TSA's something to talk about on their coffee breaks.
Stay tuned!

*Edit II Feb.7*

Opted out of the x-ray machine on another flight.
This time I got frisked in public. That made all the difference in the world.
I was totally okay with it. Maybe being taken into a locked room was the difference?

5 comments:

awedmanor said...

So sorry.

I can't believe that the public in general will put up with this stuff for much longer. It's not doing any significant good, and doing tons of harm.

We're citizens, not subjects.

Doug said...

We're guilty until proven innocent.

Angie said...

. . .but I smiled when I read your "at least buy me dinner" comment. Because that's the Doug I know. . . and love!

Antheia said...

"Here's the kicker. On the way down to Texas, I go into my backpack on the plane to get my iPod and what do I see? my 4.5 inch folding knife and a 7 inch Phillips screw driver...nice job TSA's."

After your ordeal I could not help but to feel a small level of satisfaction at seeing how you inadvertently skanked one upon TSA.

So much for enhanced patdowns and hands in your pants.

Donna said...

With my titanium knees I have to request a pat down. I did notice the most recent ones were a bit more thorough. But it's a small price to pay, I think, for security. Well, that was until you said you got a knife and a screwdriver on board...